Brothers?
by Flashfire Freak
Summary: What does Naruto find out about his dna sample on the Internet? And who is the freaky kid on the Internet? Please read and review for me to continue.
1. DNA

Brothers!?

Written By Flashfire

Rated: T for Teen

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the registered characters. I am not responsible for your mental scarring if any should occur.

Author Note: My cousin gave me ideas on this fanfiction, and in turn, I wrote a fanfiction for ya'll to read.

Chapter 1

Naruto was online checking his dna sample with other people around the world to see if there was a match, or someone close to his dna sample. After a few minutes of looking at the screen, which yielded nothing but the searching symbol. He decided to go watch a movie in his private basement. As soon as he turned on the tv, he changed the channel to his private tv network. Naruto thought to himself after a few moments that he should check on Neji.

When he got to Neji's channel, he noticed that Neji had 15 blonde barbie dolls in front of him and he was kissing them in turn and playing with them. Disgusted, Naruto went channel surfing. As he was surfing the channels, he saw Hinata sitting on the floor in the middle of her room, surrounded by many Naruto pictures. Confused, Naruto zoomed in and turned the sound up. What he heard freaked him out.

Hinata wasn't stuttering at all. Naruto noticed one thing, she had a pretty voice.

"Naruto, why will you not show affection back to me? I want to care for you, and I want you to openly love me."

Naruto said out loud," Wow, I didn't think that she was showing affection for me. I thought she was just a stalker. Not a lover." Then a chirp came from his computer. He turned off the tv and went to the computer. What came up surprised him. It was a picture of a black-haired kid with a red and one cap on, his right, index finger picking his nose, and a pikachu sitting on the human's shoulder.

"WTF?!!!!!!" said Naruto


	2. Who?

Brothers!?

Written By Flashfire Freak

(flames will be used to cook the waffles I eat)

Rated: T for Teen

Disclaimer: I do not own any registered characters or anything like that.

Author Note: I'm not on crack. I'm also not on my ADHD medicine. So, noting that let the fanfiction continue.

Chapter 2

"This is your closest match." said the computer.

"What the...!?" said Naruto.

"The picture is of Ash Ketchum, your long lost brother." declared the computer.

"Ok, now I know I've had too much expired ramen for breakfast." Naruto said.

"Would you like to contact Ash?" asked the computer.

"Um...No. I want an aspirin for my headache, and I want that guy to die cause he's so retarded." Naruto declared.

"Hahaha, so funny. But I don't want to die yet mister." said a mysterious voice.

Naruto turned around and became face to face to the guy that had the almost the same dna as himself. The mysterious person said, "Hello, my name is Ash Ketchum. I want to be a pokemon master."

"Hahahahahahahahahahaha! You're a riot." Naruto laughed.

"How is that funny?" questioned Ash.

"You're dead." Naruto said quietly.

Naruto pulled out a few kunai knives and began to throw them at Ash when the basement door opened and Sasuke. Sasuke said, "Hey, lets have a drinking party."

So agreeing, Naruto, Ash, and Sasuke pulled out a couple of beers and began drinking. As soon as Sasuke put the beer bottle to his lips, the basement door opened and…..

That's the end of chapter two. Please read and review so I will be inspired to continue in this series.


	3. Who's There?

Brothers!?

Written By Flashfire T for Teen

Disclaimer: I do not own any registered characters.

Author Note: I'm writing hard and fast so everyone can read this series constantly.

Chapter Three

Sasuke no sooner put the beer bottle to his lips when the door burst open and there stood a fuming Sakura. She went over to Sasuke and ripped the bottle out of his hands. Sasuke began protesting but the angry look on Sakura's face shut him up in a heartbeat. Sakura began shouting at Sasuke.

"WHAT IN THE WORLD WERE YOU THINKING?! YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE WATCHING THE KIDS! BUT NO, YOU GO OUT AND GET DRUNK. EXPLAIN YOURSELF!"

"No explanation." Sasuke said calmly.

"FINE THEN, YOU'RE DEAD!" screamed Sakura.

Sakura quickly pulled out a kunai knife and stabbed Sasuke 50 times in multiple places. Then she took out his wallet, emptied it, and stormed out of the house.

"That was random." Naruto said quietly.

"Um... I agree." Ash said.

After a few minutes of sitting in solitude, Ash spoke. "Hey, its Naruto, right?"

"Yeah, why?" asked Naruto uncertainly.

"Want to watch tv?" Ash asked meekly.

"Nah, I want to go ask out Sakura." Naruto said uncertainly.

"Ok, I'm going to go back home. Brock and Misty might need to be woken up before they have sex again." Ash said tiredly.

"Ok, have fun with that." Naruto replied, absent-mindedly.

"Wait, what are you going to do with the dead body?" asked Ash.

"Well, now that you mention it, you're going to take it and dump it out in the street." replied Naruto.

"Why me?" whined Ash.

"Cause you're the younger brother." replied Naruto.

"Who told you that?" asked Ash.

"What told me, not who told me, and it was my computer that told me." Naruto said. "Now remove the dead body before you become the next dead body."

Ash grumbling dragged Sasuke's body up the stairs and out into the street. After brushing off his hands on his pants, he looked up and a human was crossing the street, going away from Ash. The next thing he knew, he was seeing black and feeling pain.

That's the end of chapter three. Please read and review.


	4. Dead

Brothers!?

Written By Flashfire Freak

Rated: T for Teen

Disclaimer: I do not own any registered characters or anything like that.

Author Note: I have had many reviews saying that I should continue this fanfic. I'm please to announce that I will continue this fanfic throughout the rest of the summer, and I hope even until I die.

Chapter Four

The next thing Ash feels is the sidewalk below him. He looks around and spots a receding figure in the distance. Ash yelled,"Hey, excuse me, but the figure was gone the next instant. Looking around confused, he spots a doughnut store, he goes towards it. As he touches the door to push it open, he feels pain, and sees black.

As Ash wakes up, he smells pizza, and he manages to stumble out of the bed he was lying down on and goes towards the smell. Ash rounds the corner and finds himself in a big bear hug with Barney.

"Bad Barney, bad. No hugging Ash." said a tired voice.

Barney ignores the voice and hugs Ash even harder. As Ash was slowly running out of oxygen, he feels Barney tighten his grip, then loosen, and finally falls to the floor with kunai knives stuck in his back. Ash looks over and sees Naruto pulling out a chainsaw out of the cupboard and starts it up. Naruto goes over to the slowing dying Barney and starts cutting off Barney's limbs. As Naruto was cutting of Barney's arms and legs, Barney was howling and screaming for Naruto to stop.

Naruto responds by cutting off Barney's head slowly, as to enjoy his pain. Ash runs from the kitchen, only to run into a wall. He looks up and sees Naruto standing over him with the chainsaw still running. Naruto begins to cut off Ash's limbs when he awakens from his nightmare only to find that all of his limbs were still attached and were fine, however, he was lying on the floor. He stands up and walks into the kitchen.

When Ash got into the kitchen, he asks Naruto, "What was the big pink and green thing in here before?"

"Oh, that was Barney." Naruto replied shortly.

"Where is he now?" asked Ash meekly.

"He's outside chopped up into bits and pieces with a chainsaw." Naruto said.

"Oh, good. Now, if you don't mind, I need to get home." replied Ash.

"Nothing's stopping you from leaving." Naruto said.

"Oh, ok. Have a nice day then." Ash said, pulling out his travel-warper, and travels to Pallet Town.

That's the end of chapter four. Thanks for reading and reviewing, and please continue to read and review. Now, if you all don't mind, I'm going to go take a break from writing for a bit.


	5. A New Home

Brothers!?

Written By Flashfire Freak

Rated: T for Teen

Disclaimer: I do not own any registered characters.

Author Note: After a brief break of Mario Kart Double Dash and putting Mentos in Diet Coke, I'm back to writing the next chapter of the wonderful and most random fanfic I have ever written.

Chapter Five

As Ash was teleporting out of Naruto's kitchen, Kakashi was walking into the kitchen with multiple bags of take-out food.

"Hey Kakashi, whats up?" asked Naruto.

"Nothing but take-out for me." declared Kakashi.

"Why, don't you have a job?" asked Naruto.

"Not any more. I resigned after training you all." Kakashi said sadly.

"Do you have a place to live now?" Naruto asked.

"No. I just sort of live where ever I can find a place to stay." Kakashi said.

"Would you like to live here Kakashi?" offered Naruto.

"If you'll let me stay." Kakashi said slowly.

"Sure, you can stay as long as you like, as long as you can possibly help out with the bills, I mean, you don't have to pay much, just enough so I can afford the extra cost of you living here." said Naruto.

"Thanks Naruto. You're a real life saver." Kakashi said happily.

"Any time Kakashi." said Naruto.

"Naruto. Would you allow me to dig a tunnel from your basement to another living area where I can live, but run water, electricity and other supplies to that area?" asked Kakashi.

"Sure. I'll even help you later on, after I get some materials from the store." Naruto said.

"Thanks Naruto. Hey, Naruto, I brought you some tacos." said Kakashi.

Kakashi hands a brown bag to Naruto

Naruto opens the bag to get his food, when...

That's the end of chapter five. I'm sorry there wasn't much random or funny in that part, but the next few chapters I'm planning on more funny and more randomness. Please read and review, and maybe I'll get the next chapter up soon.


	6. Double Hitter

Brothers!?

Written By Flashfire Freak

(The flames make certain my nachos stay warm all night long.)

Rated: T for Teen

Disclaimer: I do not own any registered characters.

Author Note: Right after writing the fifth chapter, I felt like it was a big disappointment, so I decided to amp up this chapter to make up for last chapter's slowness and such.

Chapter Six

As Naruto opened the take-out bag, FredFred Burger jumped out, ran out of the room saying, "I like nachos."

Naruto looked in the bag and saw all of the nachos eaten, except for some crumbs. He looked at Kakashi and asked, "I thought you got me tacos, not nachos."

Kakashi looked at Naruto with a blank look on his face. Then he realized something. Kakashi had eaten all of the tacos so he got nachos for Naruto, but seeing as he wasn't sober, he couldn't remember what he ate and what he was giving to Naruto.

"Sorry Naruto, I must have eaten the tacos instead of the nachos. But they are perfectly fine though." said Kakashi.

"No problem. Hold on a minute because I gotta get that freak of nature that ate my nachos." said Naruto as he was starting up his chainsaw.

"I'll put the nachos into the microwave to warmup." yelled Kakashi.

Naruto looked back at Kakashi questionally. As Naruto walked into his living room, FredFred Burger jumped out from behind the couch and ran straight into the chainsaw.

"Well, that takes care of one pest in this house. Now, its time for me to get the other one." Naruto said to himself.

Kakashi was walking out of the kitchen just as Naruto was running into the kitchen. As quick as a flash, Kakashi was mutilated and was missing many body parts, which were strewn across the floor. Naruto got the broom and swept all of the body parts out into the street, following by disenfectant where the bodies were.

That's the end of chapter six. I hope you liked it. I'm working on making the chapters longer and have more detailed descriptions about the bodies that Naruto had destroyed.


	7. Located

Brothers!?

Written By Flashfire Freak

(Duct tape is full of fiber, so go eat some)

Rated: T for Teen

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any other registered characters.

Author Note: I'm going to try and see if I can make a 5,000 word chapter, so there will be less clicking, and more reading.

Chapter Seven

Naruto decided that after a hard day of cutting people open that he should add some romance to his life. So, determined to get a lover, he locked up his house (as if there was anything to steal), and went to Hinata's house. When he got there, he promptly rang the doorbell, which resonated throughout the entire house. Hinata, the only one home at the time, came to the door, looked through the peephole, and discovered that Naruto, the whom she loved dearly, was at the door. Quickly she pinched herself to make certain that she wasn't dreaming. Only after that, did she open the door.

When Hinata opened the door, Naruto asked, "Hinata, would you allow me to come in?" Hinata nodded weakly, and Naruto stepped into the Hyuga main branch household. Instantly awed by the enormity and wealth of the house, Naruto absent-mindedly follow Hinata up the staircase to her room to talk. On arriving at Hinata's bedroom door, Hinata opened the door, and they stepped into her room. Naruto and Hinata decided to sit on the floor. After a period of silence, Hinata worked up enough courage to ask Naruto, "Naruto,ummmmm, how did you ummmmmm, know where to find me?"

"Hahahahahahahaha, wouldn't you like to know?" replied Naruto smiling.

Hinata nodded and smiled weakly.

"Well, before I answer your question, I want you to answer my question. Why do you love me?" asked Naruto.

"Ummmm..." replied Hinata

That's the end of chapter seven. Expect more romance from now on, but there will still be plenty of chainsaw killings. Please read and review, and if you flame, I don't care.


	8. Attacked!

Brothers!?

Written By Flashfire Freak

(Don't be like me, go outside and exercise by swimming or working out with weights. It really feels good to weightlift.)

Rated: T for Teen

Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto or any registered characters.

Author Note: I'm writing this 8th chapter around midnight my time. See, even writers work late.

Chapter Eight

"Naruto, I feel that you have so much courage, that it radiates out from you and it enters into me, and I feel more confident in myself. You care about more than yourself. Naruto, you're a really nice guy." explained Hinata confidently.

"Hmmmmmm. Well, that would explain a lot. I mean, I never thought that you would feel more confident about yourself. That would explain why you were waving at me at times, and why you acted shy around me. You wanted to feel loved and not rejected like most of your family makes you feel." said Naruto calmly.

"How did you know all of that?" asked Hinata incrediously.

"Oh, its on your bulletin board over there." said Naruto casually.

Hinata turned around and looked at the bulletin board. Blushing, she got up quickly and took down the papers. As Hinata was sitting back down on the floor, there was a flash of light and instantly Ash was standing beside Naruto. Ash quickly said,"You two, follow me. We have a crisis outside. Kakashi has turned everyone in the village into zombies, and we need to stop them."

"Ok, I'll take care of them. Both of you can watch me destroy the zombies." said Naruto confidently.

(0)Naruto pulls out a chainsaw and makes 50 doppelgangers.(0)

As the many Naruto were running around the village with chainsaw cutting down zombie after zombie in mere seconds, the orginial Naruto was having his first, and unknown to him, his last kiss with Hinata. After kissing Hinata very quickly, Naruto ran into battle and started killing every zombie in sight.

(0)After the battle has ended.(0)

"I'm going to go look for Naruto." said Ash.

"I'm coming with you." declared Hinata

"No you're not." Ash ordered.

"Yes I am." Hinata protested.

(0)After much arguing...(0)

"Fine you can come along." Ash said wearily.

"Yeay! I get to see my boyfriend soon." Hinata said happily.

(0)Ash and Hinata walk around the village until they find Naruto lying dying in the middle of a street.(0)

"NARUTO! Are you ok?" asked Hinata worriedly.

Naruto strained his eyes to look at Hinata, before closing his eyes for the last time. Ash flips Naruto onto his back, and jumps back, because of many places where flesh should be, wasn't because the zombies ate his flesh. Horrified, Ash turns and runs away until he shortly is captured by a zombie who promptly rips off Ash's head and eats the organs and drinks the blood, until the zombie just explodes from some unknown source. Hinata goes over to Naruto's body, kisses his lips, then closes his eyes. Finally, Hinata pulls out a kunai knife, and plunges it straight into her heart.

Feeling the pain receding slowly, Hinata turns her head towards Naruto, where her eyes lay when she finally dies.

That's the end of the fanfic. I hope you all enjoyed this fanfic. Please read and review, and I'll start a new fanfic soon, hopefully, and get it up for you all to read.


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